The 12 Marauder days of Christmas!
by Lily Jay
Summary: The 12 Marauder days of Christmas! trust me... you'll roffle your pants off! please review!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: MY friend (DragonFaynge96) and I wrote this awhile ago...it's our new obsession. Some of it may be an inside joke... but i'm pretty sure you can keep up... happy reading! please review!**

James- Hey, guys? Wouldn't it be cool if there were more days of Christmas than just one?

Sirius- What made you think that up?

James- I Dunno... It's just that Christmas ends so fast. Wouldn't it be cool if it were longer?

Remus- How many days are you thinking James?

James- Hmm... Twelve!

Peter- Twelve?! That's sure a lot! Why twelve?

James- Yeah! Twelve! It's a good number! I can imagine it now!

James- On the first day of Christmas my Lily gave to me...

Sirius- A Snitch on top of the tree!

James- No! I wasn't gonna say that!

Sirius- On the second day of Christmas my fan girls gave to me...

James- Two kisses each!

Remus- Sounds plausible...

Sirius- And a snitch on top of the tree!

James- Sirius!!

James- Remmy! Your turn! Go!

Remus- Um...OK. On the third day of Christmas my best friends gave to me...

Sirius- Three new books!

Remus- Really? Thanks!

Peter- Two kisses _each_?

James- Uh-Huh!

Sirius- And a snitch on top of the tree!

James- Stop it!

Remus- Peter give it a try!

Peter- O-on the fourth day of Christmas my Mother? Gave to me?

James- Four scolding words!

Sirius- That's your mother James...

James- Oh yeah...

Remus- Three new books!

James- Two kisses each! And-

Sirius- A SNITCH ON TOP OF THE TREE!

James- Knock it off!

Regulus- Can I try?

James and Remus- When did HE get here?

Regulus- On the fifth day of Christmas my parents gave to me...

James and Sirius- FIVE QUIDDITCH TEAMS!!

Regulus- Hey!

Peter- F-Four scolding words.

James- Three new books!

Remus- Two kisses each...

James- And a-

Sirius- Snitch on top of the tree!

James- I said stop it!

Lily- Can I have a go?

Sirius- No girls allowed!

James- Sure! Go ahead!

Lily- On the sixth day of Christmas my teachers gave to me...

Sirius- Six perfect scores...

Lily- Jerk...

James and Sirius- FIVE QUIDDITCH TEAMS!!

Regulus- Guys!

Remus- Four scolding words...

Peter- Three new books...

James- Two kisses each! And-

Sirius- A snitch on top of the tree!

James- But I'm a _CHASER_!

Lily- Sev! C'mon! You next!

Sirius- No Fugly people!

Severus- On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me!

Sirius and James- Seven potion kits...

Severus- I heard that!

Sirius- Six perfect scores...

Lily- Stop it, Sirius!

James and Sirius- FIVE QUIDDITCH TEAMS!!

Regulus- Ugh...

James- Four scolding words!

Remus- Three new books!

Peter-Two kisses each!

Sirius- And a quaffle hits James in the knees!

James- Oww...

Dumbledore- On the eighth day of Christmas the students gave to me...

Remus- Dumbledore?

Dumbledore- Eight pairs of socks!

James- Seven potion kits...

Severus- Hey!

Sirius- Six perfect scores...

Lily- I said stop!

James and Sirius- FIVE QUIDDITCH TEAMS!!

Regulus- Four scolding words?

Peter- I guess so...

Remus- Three new books!

James- Two kisses each!

Sirius- And a bludger barely misses Lily!

James- AH! NO!

Narcissa- On the ninth day of Christmas Widdle Siwius gave to me...

Sirius- Nothing!

Narcissa- How rude...

Dumbledore- Eight pairs of socks!

Sirius and James- Seven potion kits...

Severus- Stop.

James- Make me.

Sirius- Six perfect scores...

Lily- I said QUIT IT YOU JERK!!

James and Sirius- FIVE QUIDDITCH TEAMS!!

Regulus- I give up...

Peter- Four scolding words...

James- Three new books!

Remus- Two kisses each!

Sirius- And James' broom is history!

James- Not my broom!

Lucius- On the tenth day of Christmas Narcissa gave to me...

Regulus- Ten money bags!

Narcissa- Shut up! I did not!

Regulus- Uh-huh...

Sirius- NOTHING!

Dumbledore- Eight pairs of socks!

James- Seven potion kits...

Severus- Arg...

Sirius- Six perfect scores...

Lily- SIRIUS I'M WARNING YOU!!

James and Sirius- FIVE QUIDDITCH TEAMS!!

Remus- Four scolding words...

Regulus- Three new books!

Peter- Two kisses each!

Sirius- And a hot cake that is really yummy!

James- Sirius! That's mine!

Voldemort- On the Eleventh day of Christmas the death eaters gave to me.

Regulus, Lucius, and Severus- MY LORD!

Voldemort- WORLD DOMINATION!

Regulus- That's not eleven things...

Lucius- Ten money bags!

Narcissa- UGH...

Sirius- NOTHING!

Dumbledore- Eight pairs of socks!

James- Seven potion kits...

Sirius- Six perfect scores...

Lily- SHUT UP BLACK!!

James and Sirius- FIVE QUIDDITCH TEAMS!!

Peter- Four scolding words...

Remus- Three new books!

Regulus- Two kisses each...

Sirius- Remmy, Everyone is mad at me...

Remus- Not surprised...

Orion- On the twelfth day of Christmas my two sons gave to me...

Regulus- Dad?

Sirius- DADDY!

Orion- No smiling! Twelve meat cigars!

Sirius- Those are hot dogs dad...

Voldemort- WORLD DOMINATION!

Regulus- Not eleven things!

Lucius- Ten money bags!

Narcissa- Lucius!

Sirius- NOTHING!

Dumbledore- Eight pairs of socks!

James- Seven potion kits...

Sirius- Six perfect scores...

Lily- That's it! I'm telling Dumbledore!

James and Sirius- FIVE QUIDDITCH TEAMS!!

Sirius- Four scolding words...

Remus- Three new books!

James- Two kisses each...

Lily- kisses James on cheek

James- And I think I'll name our son Harry...


	2. Author's Note PLEASE READ

Hello everyone,

Lily here. It's been a hard few weeks. I've finished high school, that was fun, but I'm not really pleased with other current events. Plagiarism is on the rise. I write under the same name at Fictionpress and most (if not all) of my favorite authors have been plagiarised. This is not something I can just brush off as one of my poems over there has been stolen too.

Most of the stolen stories appear over here from FP. It makes me sick that people can't just write their own stuff. These people put a lot of effort into their stories and to see them abused like that is DISGUSTING. We have ways of finding plagiarisers and they will be punished for what they have done. Unfortunately so will many other fans who have done nothing but be faithful readers. These stories that have been loved and cherished have been removed from fictionpress **(with LOTS of proof that the original is theirs: timestamps, screenshots, copies, recopies--the works, so think again, thieves)**. Many fans will never read their favorite author's stories ever again.

I'm not sure if my stories will remain on here for much longer. I need to protect myself. This is not done lightly. It may not happen for a few weeks, but you'll probably see a lot of things coming down. I'm sorry if it's your favorite, but I need to do what's best for me.

If you have any questions or comments, please don't hesitate to PM me. I'm not changing my mind, so don't hold your breath.

I thank all of you for the time I've had here. I love you all.

XO- Lily Jay


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